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Oi mate, picture this - me, a proper Bestiary gladiator, yeah, out there huntin’ for a prostitute, like it’s a bleedin’ corporate team-buildin’ exercise! Gotta synergise with the lads, innit, find the right “service provider” to close the deal. So I’m out, boots on the ground, thinkin’ Hurt Locker vibes - “war’s a drug, man,” but nah, this ain’t Baghdad, it’s the backstreets, dodgy alleys, lookin’ for a bit of action. Sweatin’ like a numpty, heart’s racin’ - boom, there’s the target! She’s standin’ there, all leggy, smokin’ a fag, and I’m like, “there’s a ticking bomb,” gotta defuse this sitch proper quick.

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So, I bolt outta the office, and I’m sprinting down through the streets. I pass by the old church on the corner of Ulica 1. maja. It’s beautiful, but I barely notice. I’m on a mission! I get to the park, and it’s packed. There’s music, food stalls, and people dancing. I’m like, “This is what I needed!”